I remember learning how to pray from my father. It was not
that my mother didn’t try, I am sure she did. For some reason when my father
told me that I had a Father in Heaven that loved me more… I was intrigued. I
couldn’t imagine that, but I was willing to try. I addressed my Father in
Heaven and in my simple and young heart I felt something. I felt someone
listening and loving me. I loved that feeling and I prayed a lot more after
that.
Lesson #1: God is Not a Genie
I will also admit that I wasn’t quite sure what to pray
about at times. At that time, I believed that if I saw it then it was real. For
example, I believed that if Pinocchio could become a real boy then my doll
could become real too. I remember praying and praying that my doll would come
to life. Now some of you may snicker at this, but I was sincere as any child
could be. I made promises to the Lord too. I promised that I would take really
good care of her. I didn’t tell anyone of the experience and of course my doll
is still a doll, and somehow I didn’t translate that into a faith crisis. I
kept on praying. Sometimes they were answered in a way that I got something I
needed. Sometimes the answer to my prayers came in a way I couldn’t anticipate
or with a no. I learned one thing is for certain: God was NOT at all like a
Genie who grants your wishes.
Lesson #2: Answers Come in
Unexpected Ways
I remember experiencing this as an adult while serving my
mission. I was attending a meeting for
all new converts and present were some of my sweet friends who had chosen to be
baptized. I had prayed in my heart that
I would be able to express my love of the gospel and of the people I was with
that day. I was so filled with this feeling I didn’t know how I would be able
to express it. I also couldn’t figure out how to get to everyone and still stay
in contact with my companion. I prayed for an opportunity. The opportunity came
in a way I could not have anticipated. Looking back I can see that the Lord
often answered my prayers in an unexpected way. The experience is as follows:
I saw the Stake President lean over to my Mission President
and ask some questions and then he got up to begin the meeting. He began to
call people from the audiences that were new members to share their
testimonies. When he called a young man I had taught I was satisfied in my
desires and told the Lord I was so happy to just be in the meeting where this
was happening. I didn’t need to have any more blessings. The Stake President
then added,
“I am also going to
do something that is not traditional to do. I am going to call on one of our
missionaries to speak.” He then said my name...
As we were singing the opening hymn, Secret Prayer, I knew that the Lord was answering mine. Later that
day a missionary said to me that they had an investigator at that meeting who
was struggling with the decision of being baptized. He said that after my
testimony he was willing to accept that commitment. I didn’t know that
situation even existed when I spoke. I didn’t even remember what I said in my
testimony. What I did know, and still know today is there is a Father in Heaven
that hears and answers humble prayers.
Lesson #3: Aligning Our Will to
God’s is One of the Purposes of Prayer
With all the blessing I have received in prayer I have still
had some trouble too. The trouble I have had with prayer in my life is that I
haven’t always known what the will of the Lord was in a situation. I know that ultimately
only his will is what will be accomplished. Some may truly be puzzled over this
with all the evil of the adversary and his followers are allowed to assert
on others. Without getting into too much detail on that, I know that
God rose above all the evil and that he sent his son to help us rise above it
all too. The purpose of this life is not to live without opposition it is to
learn to live in opposition. What I needed to focus on was I had to align my
heart with his.
The Purpose of this life is coming to understand the will of
the Lord. When we understand that purpose it increases the power of our prayers
and ability to help others. When I started to look at prayer as me aligning my
heart with God my prayers changed significantly. I began by following the
counsel of one of my leaders who challenged us to pray according to the
dictates of the spirit. He taught about the Book of Mormon leaders who had done
this at the coming of the Savior and I was inspired by the concept and the
spirit I felt. I started to pay attention to what the Lord was trying to teach
me during my prayers and I started listening more than I was speaking.
Lesson #4: Listening to the
Spirit as We Pray Increases Our Sensitivity to the Spirit of the Lord
Following the spirit in knowing what to say in prayer was a
different concept to me. Listening to the Lord more than speaking in a prayer
changed everything. The more I tried to keep all the commandments… and be worthy
of the spirit the easier prayer became. There were plenty of times my emotional
needs and desires competed with how I prayed. In these moments of trial I learned
how to pour out my whole soul to the Lord. I asked him to fix and change my
desires and understanding according to his will. Praying in that way has helped
so much when I knew that my emotions were getting the better of me. I won’t say
I pray perfectly now. I will say that prayer has continued to be an anchor to
me during difficulty. Listening to the Lord while praying has also opened my
mind more to the spirit, and in turn I have felt guidance and protection in my
daily life.
Lesson #5: God Respects Agency
Through study and experience I have come to know that the
Lord doesn’t give up on us. The scriptures show plenty of times the Lord seeks after his
people. Our own agency (agency in this respect means the ability we have to act and make choices and not to be acted upon) as well as the agency of other is what can make things worse. At times he needs to humble people because they are using their agency poorly. This humbling makes it possible so to his voice and
follow. A SECOND CHANCE! Who doesn't need one of those? I have felt that personally that God never leaves me it is me who leaves him. Sometimes
it is hard to accept that the Lord’s will is to …
1. Give others their
agency to harm others or themselves.
2. Good people as well
as the innocent will suffer intensely in this world.
3. I don’t always get
to know how things will improve.
4. I don’t always get
to know how things will end.
As well as a host of
other reason I have heard for some I have known to quit praying. I have never known a God
that didn’t care about me, who hasn’t blessed me beyond my hopes and lifted me
above my trials. Life isn't suppose to be easy or make sense without God and his plan for us.
One of my longest trials I have been required to bare in this
life is chronic illness. I know that there are many who suffer greatly from
these things and I hope only to be a comfort as I share my experience of
praying for health while submitting to the will of the Lord in the length and
duration of this trial. It became apparent in my 20’s that there was something
really wrong even though the chronic conditions were a part of my early teen life as well. I would often pass out and exhibit hypoglycemic tendencies. I
went to many doctors both medical and naturopathic. All the time I was praying
and fasting for improved health. One of the most significant answers to prayers was
finding a doctor that practiced Chinese medicine. I had done everything I knew how
to do and I was fasting and praying to know what else I could do. The pain from
my condition was intense and because of liver damage I was unable to take pain
medication. I felt like my agency was eaten up by disease and that I was held captive by it.
Though I had moments of discouragement I tried to keep hope in my heart that my circumstances would improve. AND IMPROVE IT DID! I was at work one day with a substitute teacher. She was
speaking about a similar situation in her family where her children could not
take prescription medication. She had no idea of my prayers or condition but
she was an answer to them. I spoke to her of my situation to see if the doctor
could help my condition. I felt an electric feeling of the spirit when she said
he could. I knew I needed to contact this man and see how he could help me. Little did I know at the time that I was not just finding a way for
me to return to health I was also going to meet my future husband. I know that
most times the Lord gives us greater blessing than we can imagine in his
answers.
With great courage I left everything I knew about medical
treatment and used my agency to start my therapy in the Chinese art of medicine. I improved so
much in my health in the next few years. I had enough energy to obtain a master’s
degree and start a stand-up comedy troop, at BYU all while working full-time. I
was doing so well I was able to work-out regularly in addition to my substantial
work load and responsibilities.
Lesson #6 Opposition is a Law of Heaven so When You Feel it Pray!
Then when things were really great I was thrown into a
whirlwind of opposition. I knew in my heart that the work I was undertaking in my thesis was of vital importance so I was not surprised when the opposition came. I can honestly say that at this point in my life I never felt more pressed
upon by Satan. There was a tremendous strain on me emotionally which began but did
not end with my engagement breaking up. (This was an engagement with another
man, not my husband) Not long after my engagement ended I was bit multiple
times by a Hobo spider. Did I mention that this all happened during finals? I
was also audited by the Internal Revenue Service twice. One audit turned out to
be their mistake and the other was a slight error on my part. Needless to say this cost me dearly in time and effort. Oh and that is
not all, I was diagnosed with pre-skin cancer and had to have two small
surgeries. I also had an operation on my foot for an entirely different reason.
In addition to the emotional and physical stress I felt the house I was living in was sold and I had
to find a new place to live. Just when you think it couldn’t get worse I had to
meet with my thesis committee with my face all swollen from an allergic reaction
to an insect bite. The strain of all these situations caused my health to again
spiral downward. I for many reasons I had to quit the comedy club that I started and loved performing
in. Comedy was literally the only thing I had to look forward to during that difficult time. It hurt to quit.
Life seemed to worsen with every bit of good I tried accomplish. Still I chose to continue to pray and search for treatment. I clung to everything the spirit had taught me while searching for more answers. Sometimes answers came through an inspired thought. I also found answers as I read the scriptures, served others, sought medical help from excellent physicians and alternative medical doctors, and when I took time to be quiet and ponder.
Life seemed to worsen with every bit of good I tried accomplish. Still I chose to continue to pray and search for treatment. I clung to everything the spirit had taught me while searching for more answers. Sometimes answers came through an inspired thought. I also found answers as I read the scriptures, served others, sought medical help from excellent physicians and alternative medical doctors, and when I took time to be quiet and ponder.
Lesson #7: Don’t Ever Give Up on the Lord; He Never Gives Up on You
It has now been five years since I have again started back
on the path of healing. I passed my thesis and graduated. I have again experienced miracles. I know that miracles
happen, that God hears and will answer our prayers. One of those miracles and
answers to prayer is my little boy. My health condition was such that there was
no hope expressed by my medical doctors that I could ever become pregnant. The
Lord helped me rise above their doubts and listen to him. I am so glad the Lord
helped me through those times and guided me not to have the suggested surgery
that would have ended my pain and my chance for children. Though 11 years passed without a chance for having a child I now have my little boy.
Having my baby was such a miracle. Recovering from the C-section surgery was grueling. Recovery is longer when having a C-section anyway but it is even longer when you suffer from chronic illness and are 37 years old. Through personal prayer and prayers from my family I have found additional treatments that have relieved my condition and improved my health. I am not completely well, but I am again watching with interest how the Lord is upholding me in this trial and helping me again to rise above it. So if you ever get tired of the trials that you are called to bear I understand. I have been there, and one choice that has made it possible to continue in faith is to pray, and seek the will of the Lord while I am praying. I know that I can’t ever give up on the Lord because he never gives up on me. I know that through the atonement of Jesus Christ we can obtain the grace and mercy we are in need of to continue. I know of no better avenue to access the atonement than to pray.
If you know someone who needs to read this please feel free to share it.
Thanks,
Andrea
Having my baby was such a miracle. Recovering from the C-section surgery was grueling. Recovery is longer when having a C-section anyway but it is even longer when you suffer from chronic illness and are 37 years old. Through personal prayer and prayers from my family I have found additional treatments that have relieved my condition and improved my health. I am not completely well, but I am again watching with interest how the Lord is upholding me in this trial and helping me again to rise above it. So if you ever get tired of the trials that you are called to bear I understand. I have been there, and one choice that has made it possible to continue in faith is to pray, and seek the will of the Lord while I am praying. I know that I can’t ever give up on the Lord because he never gives up on me. I know that through the atonement of Jesus Christ we can obtain the grace and mercy we are in need of to continue. I know of no better avenue to access the atonement than to pray.
If you know someone who needs to read this please feel free to share it.
Thanks,
Andrea
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